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Have no fear, #SexyTime is here! Here’s a brand new excerpt to satisfy your cravings for this award-winning Indian romace satire website. To be clear, I am not aware of any competitor. But if another Indian romance satire outlet gets created, I’m 100% sure that mine is the best. Please enjoy. And as always, use coconut oil in moderation.

 

 

This site has continued to gain international traction and popularity!

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Did you know that http://www.51shadesofbrown.com was the most discussed reading material at Indian aunty-ji book clubs around the world?aunty-ji

If you want to impress your lover, consider making a batch of chocolate covered coconut oil!

chocolate covered coconut oil

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And without further ado, here is the newest excerpt:

 

51 Shades of Brown, (BONUS) Excerpt #43 [Chapter 172]

Valencia Contreras Balderas Calderas De Jesús appeared visibly shaken. 
She could not hide her emotions after reading the scathing bombshell text sent by her long-time boyfriend, in which he demanded “space” and “freedom” from her. The foundation of her world was in shambles.
text received
As she opened the door and entered, she quickly attempted to collect herself. 
Why did I come here in the first place?” muttered the disoriented vixen to herself in an attempt to bring things back into focus.
She had come here at this odd hour to purchase a pint of ice cream to drown her sorrows away. Each spoonful of frosty delight would blunt the pain she now felt in her heart. 
This is how we dooooo iiiiiiiit!” echoed throughout the chamber from the radio speakers. The song lyrics tugged at her heartstrings. “Oh my god,” whispered Valencia Contreras Balderas Calderas De Jesús. “That was our song.” She started to tremble, not only because of the musical selection which always put her in the mood for hanky-panky, but also because she felt overwhelmed by the vast array of ice cream flavor choices available in the freezer section.
ice cream freezer
Ma’am, are you cold?” uttered a comforting masculine voice with a thick Indian accent.
Valencia Contreras Balderas Calderas De Jesús, startled by his presence, immediately noticed that she had been shivering like an epileptic patient in the midst of violent convulsions. 
But there he stood: a beacon of warmth in the cold refrigerated section of this local gas station. 
Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram, the sexual legend himself, reached his arm around her to help increase her core body temperature. 
Not all heroes wear capes,” she thought to herself.
The Brown Knight, India’s greatest sex symbol, just so happened to be working the overnight graveyard shift at this 7-Eleven convenience store!
7 Eleven
And not only was she able to openly gaze at his thick, lustrous mustache in person, but she could do it with no-strings-attached after all of a sudden finding herself wildly, and conveniently, single.
mustache
May I help you select an ice cream flavor?” inquired the gentleman with the skinny, bony frame, typical of men in the mother homeland of India.
I lust for some chocolate,” whispered the Latina diva as her voice trailed off, “the darker, the better...”
At that moment, she glanced at his mocha-colored skin underneath his body hair tufts, which had been perfectly coated with coconut oil lubricant. Valencia immediately concluded that this Indian man was much more handsome than Apu, the most famous convenience store character on television.
Apu
She wondered if she had made her carnal desires too obvious to the noble cashier.
With his arm still wrapped around her shoulders, he opened the door to the freezer and selected a pint of the “Dark Chocolate Desires” ice cream flavor. 
ice cream pint
Oh no!” exclaimed the fit woman. “I usually get lite ice cream so that I can maintain my perfect, toned figure. This has far too many calories.
Valencia boo bae, you don’t gotta worry ’bout none of that. Those calories will go to all the right places on your tight body,” Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram convincingly insisted while scanning her body up and down with an intensity she had never before witnessed.
So…you like….junk in the trunk?” whispered Valencia Contreras Balderas Calderas De Jesús.
The Brown Knight smiled and offered “Valencia bae boo, who doesn’t like a curvy badonkadonk?
How the hell did you even know my name?!” she asked.
You still are wearing your name tag from Victoria’s Secret,” he responded.
Sure enough, she looked at her pendulous bosom and noticed that she forgot to change after finishing her work shift. She recognized that he had the keen vision of an eagle to be able to decipher the word “Valencia” from her entire full name which had been squeezed onto the tag using small font. 
May I also interest you in a complimentary sample of my special slurpee?” asked the Indian folk hero.
Slurp….slurpee?” she groaned.
slurpee
Yes, sweet thangy-thang,” said the Brown Knight as he guided her to the slurpee machine. He placed a cup below the spout and grunted while pulling down the lever with authority. She could barely contain herself as she stared at the luscious creamy substance flowing smoothly into the receptacle.
Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram suggestively inserted a long straw into the vessel, whispered “Open your mouth” to the moaning woman, and pushed the tip in between her supple lips.
Valencia Contreras Balderas Calderas De Jesús, taken aback by his assertiveness, revealed her innocence by asking “What do I do now? Suck?
The Brown Knight grinned and replied “Yes, Valencia bae. Suck and it will come.”
straw
She did his bidding as she clutched the paper cup. The savory slurpee oozed into her mouth and ignited her taste buds. “Oh my God,” she breathlessly whispered. “What secret ingredients did you add to this divine love potion?
He snickered, and then revealed his secret. “Garam masala, red chili powder, various other Indian spices, and most important, coconut oil, one of the world’s most potent natural aphrodisiacs.”
While she continued to sip his love juice, her eyes were drawn to the engorged, glistening hot dog wiener which hypnotically rotated in the glass warming case near where they stood.
hot dog
She instinctively clenched her fist in a vain attempt to stifle her wandering mind, thereby crushing the slurpee cup and spraying the creamy substance all over her face and chest.
I noticed you’re parked at gas dispenser #4. Would you like me to come outside and pump…..for you?” he inquired.
Pump…yes….oh god yes…pump,” stammered the smitten Hispanic female in heat.
gas pump
The Brown Knight then receded to his work area behind the checkout counter to process the transaction. His attention interrupted her glare towards the extra-large sized contraceptives hanging on the counter rack. She couldn’t help but notice that the condoms had been imported from India and were lubricated with coconut oil “for her pleasure.”
Those won’t be necessary,” suggestively whispered Valencia Contreras Balderas Calderas De Jesús, to which the Brown Knight offered a knowing wink. 
Her body began to swell in anticipation of pleasures of the flesh with this Indian sex symbol. Her fantasy of Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram commanding her with the phrase “Say my name” in her bedroom was interrupted by a sudden rush of fear since she couldn’t properly pronounce it…
Straight outta India
Scroll down to read all 42 prior excerpts (excerpt #42 was my best received piece among the literary community!).
Also, if you’re impressed with my ability to write Latin women, this is the 5th excerpt involving a Latina vixen! Check out these 4 other Hispanic hotties who caught the brown fever:
 
To learn more about the world famous author of http://www.51shadesofbrown.com, Dr. Pablo Pablo Pistol [@drpablopistola on Twitter], click on the following link: https://51shadesofbrown.wordpress.com/about/
Dr Pablo Pistola
Scroll down to enjoy all 42 archived excerpts below!

 

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About the Author

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Dr Pablo Pistola had become increasingly dissatisfied with satisfaction-based forces in medicine. He felt like a doctor without a purpose. He subsequently embarked on a 7 year twerking quest in the Himalayan foothills to find his true calling. During this journey, he realized that he has a secret talent: his immense knowledge about women. He understands them. Legend has it that he can size up a woman’s soul in a mere instant. He didn’t ask for these powers. But with great powers come great responsibilities. So Dr Pablo Pistola (double-board certified in Love Medicine & Romance Medicine, with fellowship training in Seduction Medicine) has been dabbling in satirical erotic writing. And if satirical erotic writing can offer a viable exit strategy from medicine, then the world will be a better place. His responsibility is to bring the stories of lust to you. He also is an avid life-long Miami Heat fan. Dr Pistola’s medical satire contributions: http://www.gomerblog.com/author/drpablopistola/ Twitter: @drpablopistola

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