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#SexyTime Friday is back, but this time I have a special treat for you! American actors were hired to reenact the gripping dialog at the conclusion of this excerpt, and the video link (YouTube) is posted at the bottom! Please please please “follow” my blog to receive updates when I post new excerpts. And please spread the word about to everybody you know, including your own mother. She will enjoy my writing. Trust me. And as always, use coconut oil in moderation.

Dr Pablo Pistolacoconut_oil


My writing has the above effect on women, though my readers tend to have a much more oily experience.

51 Shades of Brown, (BONUS) Excerpt #19 [Chapter 82]

Chandraswaroopashashikalachandramanimohini had worked far too hard all her life to fall short on this grand stage. Her unparalleled work ethic and dazzling presence had fostered her meteoric rise to Assistant to the Assistant to the Assistant District Attorney. Today would be the watershed moment that would seal her career trajectory.

Succeed, and she would surely secure a job promotion, book deals, rights to Bollywood screenplay adaptations of the proceedings, and untold riches.

Fail, and her professional job security would be in shambles, thereby forcing her to sell her body to the night in order to make ends meet and maintain her lifestyle.

There was no middle ground.

The gripping courtroom drama of this so-called “Trial of the Millennium” had galvanized not just the entire nation, but also the whole globe. Sensational news coverage fueled the public’s insatiable thirst for any morsel of information, no matter how trivial or scandalous. The media circus had spawned an army of amateur detectives posting a constellation of disorganized factoids at online forums for public dissection. There even was an immensely-popular, internationally-downloaded podcast documenting the mystifying emotional torment of host Sarahbhagwantidhanadeepa Koenig-Patel as she pored over each excruciating detail of the case in chronologic order, while never quite arriving at any particular conclusion. Everyone was invested in the outcome from today’s proceedings.


And to add even more pressure, everythingthe outcome of the whole case – would hinge on today’s testimony. The case against the celebrity defendant was largely circumstantial. Could the mega-superstar Ashwaryamadhuriranihemamadhubalamumtaz Dixitraimukerjimalini really have been guilty of murdering several of her love-interests? It seemed as though any man who had fallen prey to her web of seduction ultimately suffered an untimely death which would invariably baffle forensics experts. Whispers echoed through the Bollywood community about how the passing away of each of her lovers, always under suspicious circumstances, invariably remained shrouded in mystery. Rampant innuendos had earned her the infamous “Black Widow” tabloid moniker.

Was her desire to conquer and then subsequently destroy men her vice? The world was about to find out, as she finally was brought before the judge, jury and riveted courtroom gallery to submit to cross-examination. Who could outsmart Ashwaryamadhuriranihemamadhubalamumtaz and finally force this duplicitous criminal to face justice?

Enter Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram. A hero rises.

Chandraswaroopashashikalachandramanimohini spearheaded the unconventional recruitment of the Brown Knight to assist because of his intangible je ne sais quoi. He had that “it” factor that mesmerized audiences. And his encyclopedic knowledge of every law of the land served as an indispensable resource to her research during this landmark case. He was the game-changer. He was the ace-in-her-hole. He was her everything.

During the many tense sleepless nights in preparation for the case, there were fleeting moments when she sensed the potential for something beyond merely a professional relationship. But she withstood her obsessions about pleasures of the flesh with him and kept her hands to herself, like a good little Indian girl.

Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram orchestrated the strategy to use his power as an international sex symbol to lure the defendant out of her shell and let her guard down. He would weaponize his masculinity, and utilize his irresistible aroma of curry and coconut oil, all with the intention of seducing her into thinking that she had been seducing him. He would gain the upper-hand and control her. This would be no different than all the times the Brown Knight had tamed wild, bucking horses in the jungles of India by whispering in the animals’ ears before gently mounting the creatures. He possessed an uncanny talent for diffusing tension and disarming a woman who was on-edge.

Through his subconscious tactics, Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram enticed Ashwaryamadhuriranihemamadhubalamumtaz into thinking that he wanted her so badly that he would sabotage the case in order to free her. The evil woman felt as though she had secured an exit strategy yet again.

But now the Brown Knight, during his interrogation of the Black Widow, had sprung his traps and thrown a curveball of his own. He relentlessly badgered the defendant into submission, and then, as he passed by her seat on the witness stand, he pulled the rug out from under her by surrreptiously whispering that he would no longer facilitate her expected freedom.

The Black Widow erupted in front of the stupefied audience, as ominous organ music approaching a crescendo blasted from the courtroom speakers in order to set the tone for the pivot point in this real-life drama.

YOU WERE GOING TO HELP ME! THIS ISN’T HELPING ME!!!” shrieked the overwhelmed Ashwaryamadhuriranihemamadhubalamumtaz.

Everything was unfolding just as the Brown Knight had planned.

In response, Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram feigned surprise with a quizzical facial expression while further baiting his target with sarcasm: “I was going to help you?”

The Black Widow retorted “YOU SAID —“

Why would I help you?” replied the Brown Knight.

Because……You want it. You want this…..” said the Black Widow, as she seductively writhed on the witness stand while grabbing her private area.

The shocked audience knew that the case had turned.

DON’T WALK AWAY!” begged the sobbing Ashwaryamadhuriranihemamadhubalamumtaz, as Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram walked away towards the counsel table where the awaiting Chandraswaroopashashikalachandramanimohini was seated in full-heat.

And in that instant, Chandraswaroopashashikalachandramanimohini aimed a knowing glance at Sri-Sheshadariprativadibayankaram, who she could no longer resist for even a moment…

AND HERE IS THE VIDEO LINK FOR THE REENACTMENT OF THE GRIPPING SCENE AT THE END OF EXCERPT #19 (right-click on link and open in new tab to enjoy both simultaneously)

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Dr Pablo Pistola had become increasingly dissatisfied with satisfaction-based forces in medicine. He felt like a doctor without a purpose. He subsequently embarked on a 7 year twerking quest in the Himalayan foothills to find his true calling. During this journey, he realized that he has a secret talent: his immense knowledge about women. He understands them. Legend has it that he can size up a woman’s soul in a mere instant. He didn’t ask for these powers. But with great powers come great responsibilities. So Dr Pablo Pistola (double-board certified in Love Medicine & Romance Medicine, with fellowship training in Seduction Medicine) has been dabbling in satirical erotic writing. And if satirical erotic writing can offer a viable exit strategy from medicine, then the world will be a better place. His responsibility is to bring the stories of lust to you. He also is an avid life-long Miami Heat fan. Dr Pistola’s medical satire contributions: Twitter: @drpablopistola


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